FRONTLINE gaijin Saiko Yunokawa sends a recorded message from Los Angeles, USA to explain her absence from tonight’s show and discusses how much she is looking forward to competing in Japan.
The video shows Saiko Yunokawa, a.k.a. Laurel Anne Hardy, standing in a backstage area at an arena. She’s wearing extravagant makeup and black-and-multicoloured wrestling tights, with an old, holey longsleeved Sleater-Kinney sweatshirt over the top. She smiles warmly, and addresses us in fluent Japanese.
“Hello, everyone! I’m so sorry I can’t be there for FRONTLINE’s first ever show, but I’m here in Los Angeles for WARPED, where tonight my tag team partner and I, the lovely Leanne Evangelista, are going to teach the CarnEvil Connection why you don’t play games with Dragons. I promise I’ll be with you next week, and I’m heartbroken I couldn’t be there with you tonight. It is such an honour to be accepted into FRONTLINE, to be in the same company as legends of Japanese wrestling like Jun Ikeda, Kazuki Suzuki and The Great Sato. I’ve always been such a massive fan of puro, which is pretty much why I got into wrestling, and especially of the Japanese junior heavyweight and joshi scenes, they’ve been such a huge influence on my own wrestling. When I was ten, I came to stay with my dad and my brothers and sisters in Obihiro for the summer for the first time, and we travelled to Sapporo to see a cross-promotional match between Dragon Takeshi and Arata Tanaka. That, I think, was the moment I decided I wanted to be a wrestler. I can’t wait to come back to Japan, to try and hopefully do FRONTLINE and my own Japanese heritage proud, and to show the FRONTLINE fans what I can do. Because I promise that when you watch Saiko Yunokawa you don’t just get a wrestling match, you get a four-dimensional supernova in combat sports performance art. You get a paradigm shattered in every match or your money back. It’s my life’s work to become the most thrilling spectacle in wrestling history and next week, FRONTLINE fans, I’m so excited to make you all part of it. See you then, and stay fabulous. Love to you all.”
And she signs off with a peace V and a big grin.